we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
