we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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