Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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