i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
