I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize