you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize