I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize