please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
