she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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