No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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