Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Randomize
