i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I'm too high and old for this...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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