When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
