Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
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