Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize