worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
