i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
