He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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