Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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