big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
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