Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
