I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
i out mim tonsoeep
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