dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
