My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
