I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
