I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
