Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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