No, you can still breathe under the balls.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
