If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
