Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
