I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize