There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
