hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
