Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
