Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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