that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
