PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize
