some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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