Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Drunk is not a location!
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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