Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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