hell yes lets make some ravioli
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Shame - the story of my life.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
