Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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