You smell like a Billy Joel song
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize