Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
is that a dick in a sweater?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
