The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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