dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
