when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize