Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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