I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
