Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
